Love

I started reading a new devotions book this week, and let me tell yuh, there has not been one day that it has not rocked my world.

One of the days this week challenged me to pick a verse out of the bible, ANY VERSE, and memorize and meditate on it for the month. I had a few in mind to do, but when I opened my Bible App, the verse of the day was Galatians 5:22-23- “But the Holy Spirit produces this kind of fruit in our lives: love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, gentleness, and self-control.” I knew right away that that was the verse that God wanted me to not only memorize, but really reflect on. After reading each word, I realized that I do not always have a lot of these fruits of the spirit. I felt challenged to work on each one separately for a week. These are the kinds of qualities that I WANT to have… but am not always good at showing.

This week I started out with love. We just so happen to be going through a love/relationship series at youth, so I thought it would tie right along with that. Love should be an easy one, right? I have love for my husband, son, family, friends. But do I always show it? Do they know how much I love them?

Love is a choice.

It’s not just some feeling you get that lasts forever.

You have to choose, everyday, to love. Even when you don’t feel like it. Even when your spouse made you mad. Or is driving you nuts. Or when you could just physically kill them. Even in those moments, you have to choose to still love them.

We have been painting and redoing our kitchen this week while we’re both on spring break from the school. Let me just say, being home all week in the mess that it is has been driving me absolutely crazy. I can barely even go into it without wanting to pull my hair out and cry. I know it’s only temporary, but I just cannot deal with it. I also cannot deal with trying to make it “ours.” We went to the store yesterday to look for other things to hang on the walls, and came out with one sign and both highly frustrated with each other.

It was in that moment that I realized that I wasn’t choosing to show my love to my husband. The one who has been staying up past midnight every night to try to finish the kitchen by the end of the week. The one who has pretty much been the master mind behind it all because I can’t make a decision to save my life. The one who has been showing MY love language by doing acts of service all week.

It is so easy to get caught up in the moments and forget about what your words and actions can do. I see now why God challenged me with this verse, because He knows that these are things that I need to work on… but yet he LOVES me through them. He loves me even when I fail, like this week.

Love is hard to explain and even harder to show sometimes, at least for me. But I will continue to show a love that our Father has for us. I will strive to CHOOSE love.

-J

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